Don't Ignore Your Instincts

by Marilyn
(Clarksville, TN)

I met a fellow who seemed like he would have been the answer to all my prayers, but something about him rubbed me the wrong way. He was really into me, but I really wasn't interested in being anything more than friends.

I told myself I was being silly, he was a perfectly nice guy, all my friends liked him, I should give him a chance. One thing led to another, and we actually got engaged.

Meanwhile, I was ignoring the way my mood was steadily dropping, that every well-intentioned thing he said to me seemed to always be the absolute wrong thing. My parents were uneasy with him, and my aunt didn't like him. His need to be right about everything meant that he wouldn't rest until I agreed with him, even when it was about an actual physical fact (like how many wires need to be in a cord for a two-line phone, which is four; he said it was two and refused to check) and he was incorrect.

It took a screaming fight about a bridesmaid's dress, of all things, and an argument about use of my computer, for me to realize that this was not the life God intended for me. If I could not trust him with administrator access on my computer, and we were arguing about whether one of our mutual friends could stand up with me, how could we be proper helpmeets for each other? How could we face sickness, poverty, or the worst things life threw us, if I didn't trust him, if he didn't respect me, and he was more interested in being right than correct?

I told him it was over. It was a relief to both of us. I lost someone who might have been a lifelong friend because I didn't listen, because I was too eager to please him and rush into marriage.

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